Bravo’s A-List Awards took place at the Hammerstein Ballroom Wednesday night and it sounded more like a dysfunctional family reunion than an actual awards show. The whole show was pretty much a circle jerk for D-listers.

Kathy Griffin hosted and being the “hip” and “with it” comedian that she is, told jokes about Miley Cyrus getting VD and about Mariah Carey being old. She also said some other stuff, but I’m too tired to type it so I’ll just quote Page Six. Pay close attention to the swearing. Notice how Kathy becomes 10 times more edgy when she throws those f-bombs:

“That motherfucker George Clooney ruined it for all of us,” she yelled. “He decided to donate his Oscar bag to some bullshit environmental organization and ruined it for me.”

Griffin, currently on the cover of A Bear’s Life - a magazine dedicated to macho, “furry” gays known as “bears” - admitted she watched “Living Lohan” and is obsessed with Dina and Ali Lohan.

“I wish I could have had a manager mom out at clubs fucking guys to get me roles,” Griffin cracked. “My mom’s at home drinking a box of wine.”

There’s a magazine dedicated to hairy gay guys? You’re goddamn right there is. The pinnacle of achievement for any actor or actress is to grace the cover of A Bear’s Life and Kathy Griffin has done it. She’s made it. In the venerable words of Kathy, “FUCK YEA!!” But Kathy Griffin wasn’t the only one happy, Lauren Hutton was too. If you can’t see the video of Lauren’s acceptance speech up above after receiving a lifetime achievement award, let me or rather, let Page Six, yet again, describe it. It rivaled that of Halle Berry’s Oscar meltdown.

Actress Lauren Hutton, who accepted a lifetime achievement honor, slurred that she hadn’t slept in 46 hours, rubbed her crotch with the big silver award and mumbled “sluts” on stage.

After that, one clap turned into thunderous applause. Wow. The Bravo A-List Awards sounds like the classiest show out there. It makes the Oscars look like a used up whore. With VD!

Did you guys see Living Lohan on E! last night?!  It was trashtastic! Ugh, it’s pathetic how excited I was to watch it!  The entire time I just kept shaking my head in disgust.  That entire family is delusional, in particular Dina Lohan.

And 14-year-old Ali Lohan wears more makeup around the house than I do to go to the bars. And I’m 10 years older than her!

In other Lohan news, happy lesbian couple Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson is said to be moving in together sometime real soon.  Aw, young love.  Tabloids are also said to be in a bidding war for Lindsay to come out of the closet exclusively on their magazine.

Dina keeps defending Lindsay’s sexuality, but in the end we know the truth.  Those two are giving each other mustache rides and they love it!

While in Cannes, Lindsay Lohan and DJ “friend” Sam Ronson attended P.Diddy’s yacht party. Lindsay’s family has been trying hard to squash the rumors that these two are not a couple.Last week while promoting her new reality show Living Lohan, Dina Lohan said: “They’re best friends. They’re just friends. It’s so silly. We actually laugh about it now. It really does hurt…but you develop thick skin. You have to ignore it.”Unfortunately, none of us believe her because the pair’s recent displays of affection suggests otherwise.

The two have been photographed holding hands and in compromising embraces and have now been photographed kissing. The Sun has more photos check them out here.I wonder if anyone really cares that Lindsay and Sam are a couple. I mean she looks much happier with a girl then she did with all those men. I think the bed hopping man-fest she had in Italy did her in. She feels that she needs a break from being manhandled. Well whatever makes her happy.

SURELY you jest, Dina.

Lindsay Lohan’s mother, Dina Lohan, says her wild-child daughter won’t appear on Dina’s new reality show - because it wouldn’t be good for her career.

What?!

“I told Lindsay I don’t want her on the show right now,” Dina Lohan tells TV Guide about “Living Lohan,” premiering May 26 on E!

“Doing reality TV would almost be taking a step backward as far as her career goes.”

The eight-episode E! series will follow Dina and her other daughter, starlet-in-training Ali, as they move from Long Island (Merrick) to the Palms hotel in Las Vegas so Ali can record her new album in the desert air.

The series is the latest sideshow in the media circus otherwise known as the Lohan family.

That includes not only Lindsay’s well-documented boozy troubles - which have been tabloid fodder for years now - but her dad, Michael Lohan, who’s had his own brushes with rehab and the law.

Michael Lohan won’t be featured in the show.

“We kept personal family issues with their dad off-limits,” Dina says. “No one wants to bash anyone.

“So we didn’t go there.”

And, Dina says. what you hear isn’t necessarily the way it really is behind-the-scenes.

“I just want to get the message across that we are a normal family,” she tells TV Guide.

“People believe I’m this crazy party mom, [but] I have never partied with Lindsay.

“If another manager goes with their child to a record-release party, it’s not in the papers,” she says. “I’m a female, so I get targeted.”

Okkkaaayyy . . . but why do a reality show?

Well, according to Dina - you guessed it - it’s the bad old media who’s to blame for the family’s less-than-stellar public image.

“I did this to defuse the rumors about my family,” she says. “The media has just been so horrific to us over the past two years.”

The Lohan’s have their own reality show on E! called “Living Lohan” which documents the daily lives of the Lohan family, most of the focus being on Lindsay’s mom and manager, Dina and her little sister, Ali.

“Viewers will go inside the Lohan’s Long Island home for the first time to follow Dina as she works double duty as mom and manager to help Ali try to follow in her big sister [Lindsay’s] famous footsteps,” a press release for the show says.Cameras will also follow the duo to Vegas as Ali records an album.

“Dina is determined to help each of her four kids fulfill their dreams and refuses to live in fear of what others may think, despite being under the paparazzi microscope,” the press release adds.

Ali has made it clear that she craves fame.

“I want it so bad. So bad you don’t even know. And now, it’s actually happening,” she told Teen Vogue this month. “I’ve already been asked for my autograph, and it’s just a really good feeling to have.”

When Dina was asked recently why she is doing this reality show she said:

“Initially if you’d asked me two years ago, would we do something like this, it would definitely be a no. I never even thought reality [TV] would be in existence now. But there are so many rumors about us and I feel that we’re in the power seat right now so that I’m able as a mom to say - this is our life, check us out and move on so we can be normal.”

“We live a normal existence in suburbia,” she says. “I do the food shopping, the laundry. There is so much sensationalism out there and people are so obsessed with celebrity. This doesn’t consume us. It really doesn’t and by showing our life, we’ll show that I don’t get up and crack the whip and say, ‘Wake up Ali and go be a star.’”

Ali had some comments about why this reality show is a good idea.

“She’s our manager and like any other mother in the world she’s trying to help her kids fulfill their dreams,” she said. “I just hate it when people twist that and make her into some kind of crazy backstage mom. She’s a mom like anybody else and I want people to know that she’s the greatest mom in the world.”

Living Lohan premirers on Monday, May 26 @ 10:30pm. In the premiere episode, Dina brings young music producer and family friend, Jeremy Greene, to Long Island to work with Ali.