I love women like Audrina Patridge because they think they’re so slick when in all reality they’re at your mercy.  Take the bruise on her face, for example.

She can casually lean over while laughing and show us some cleavage all she wants, but when a dude wants to c()ck slap her face she takes it.

Women like this will never know the definition of love, nor toe-curling orgasms.  While everyone else is unleashing their inner nympho during sex, she’ll still be posing the entire time like the fake that she is.  Half the time girls who try to sell their sex appeal are asexual to begin with.  It’s just a game to them.

Here’s Audrina and her c()ck slapped face shopping along Melrose Avenue yesterday.

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More photos after the jump!