Sexy Puerto Rican actress Nadine Velazquez is currently featured in the August issue of Maxim Magazine.

In the magazine the actress confesses, “Comparing Jaime Pressley and me is like comparing two beautiful flowers: we’re both very hot, just in different ways.”

There is nothing sexier about a person then confidence, not to be mistaken with cockiness. Call me biased, but these Latinas (i.e., Eva Mendes, Salma Hayek, Roselyn Sanchez) don’t even have to try to be sexy.  They just are.

More sexiness after the cut

Here are some shots of former Danish-Peruvian supermodel Helena Christensen hanging out with her boyfriend, Interpol frontman Paul Banks, poolside at a hotel in Miami over the weekend.

I applaud her for not rushing to the surgeon at the first signs of aging, but still it pains me to see what has become of the model who once made us drool in our pants watching her frolick topless with Chris Isaak in the video for “Wicked Games.”  Seriously, that’s one hell of a beer gut she’s sporting there.

At least she gave us a peak of her nipple while working on her tan.  Nothing like a nipple slip for us to quickly forgive and forget the imperfections.

More photos after the jump!

Admittedly she’s no Keeley Hazell, but UK glamour model Danielle Lloyd is way bang worthy.  Unlike Keeley, Danielle’s breasts aren’t real, as you can see by these photos of her at the “Adulthood” film premiere held in London yesterday.

I love a good rack as much as the next chick, but it doesn’t really turn me on when I see a scar running across the bottom of your boob.  It’s kinda like staring at a C-section scar while eating out a girl’s snatch.  Actually, no.  A C-section scar is way worse.

Because the entire time I kept looking up and thinking, ‘Some dude left his DNA inside the cavern my tongue is now and then they sliced her open and removed a living, breathing fetus. It’s at that point you realize you have to stop hooking up with high school girls.

More photos after the jump!

Ever since Sports Illustrated put Marisa Miller on the cover of the swimsuit issue she’s become an unexpected figure appearing a slew of magazine and events.

Photos of Marisa always make my panties all wet, but then I see photos of her in person and then the magic dies.  The woman is most definitely attractive and I’d kill to lay her, but ultimately she looks worn out in real life.

Marisa strikes me as the kind of All-American Girl who spends her off days surfing off the coast of her San Diego beach pad, never caring about her skin leathering up below the burning sun.

Photos of Marisa Miller in the July ‘08 issue of Maxim Magazine below.

Check out her gallery here.

More photos after the jump!

If I’m ever flying and my plane should fall from the sky, I beg that heaven blesses me with an angel like Gemma Atkinson.

Her funbags would helps us rise to the water’s surface towards heaven, where I’d be surrounded by half naked angels begging for a tongue lashings.

Gemma Atkinson is the new face of Ultimo Lingerie as presented at the opening of Debenhams department Glasgow, Scotland yesterday. Seeing these photos really put a damper on my day. As in, I literally creamed my panties the moment I saw them juggs of hers.

I’m not quite digging the Monica Lewinsky hair, but with breasts that perky, who cares! The trouble I now find is deciding whether my pearl necklace would look best on her rack or streaming outside her mouth. Decisions, decisions.

NSFW photos after the jump!

Aside from morning sex, there’s nothing more satisfying than a quick morning jerk. It really gets the blood flowing. And what a better pair of juggs to spank your monkey to than those of UK glamour model Gemma Atkinson. Start the day right, squeeze one out before your girl wakes up… or your boss walks in.

In the February 2008 issue of Nuts Magazine, Gemma Atkinson answers the predictable question: Bigger boobs or a bigger brain?

“If I had a choice between bigger boobs or bigger brains, I’d rather have the brains, I think. Although, having said that, if I had bigger boobs I’d probably make more money… but the brains would help me get a little further in life.”

I don’t think glamour models are adept enough to answer such profound questions.

Moreover, I don’t think anyone would be listening to what a glamour model would be saying. Because when you have these two melons staring at your member, nothing else matters.

What would you ladies pick– bigger boobs or a bigger brain?

A very perky Gemma Atkinson was photographed in a blue bikini while on vacation earlier this week.  I sometimes envy Gemma and the life she leads.

She’s not as thin as the average supermodel, and her face isn’t as hot as them either, but she somehow has made a career big enough to have the paparazzi photograph her while at the beach.

Lesson learned: It pays to have big tits.

UK model Danielle Lloyd showed off her trimmed down figure while on vacation in Dubai yesterday.

The 24-year-old lingerie model shed weight after singing on and training for Celebrity Gladiator.

The former Miss Great Britain said: “I was so excited when I was asked to do the show.

“I remember watching Gladiators every Saturday night when I was a kid. I never thought that one day I would be a contender myself.”

“I thought I was fit until I started training, but after the first day, every muscle in my body was aching.”

She recently insured her body for £2million, claiming “my figure is my fortune.”

Damn, £2million is whole lotta cash.  Kinda makes you wonder what Kim Kardashian has insured her ginormous ass for?  It probably depreciates every time a new man dumps his load inside it.  Nobody wants used goods!